Every time I see a "Toys for Tots" drive I picture someone in uniform giving a nicely wrapped gift to a tater tot. I know that's not what really happens but I still donate things that I think a tater tot would appreciate....like an Aquadoodle or something.
I bet Santa takes Lipitor. You can just kind of tell.
Egg Nog is nasty. You know something is gross when people only have it for one holiday...and even then only SOME people will eat it. It's like cranberry sauce. If it's so awesome why don't people have like a bologna sandwich and cranberry sauce for lunch every day?
Where is the warehouse that stores those holiday perfume and makeup gift boxes at Walgreens that are EXACTLY the same as the ones that I got for Christmas 20 years ago? Did we even have Walgreens then? Are "LipSmackers" still that popular? Is there really someone out there that asks for Windsong? If so, I really want to meet them. I want to also meet the people that ask for Jovan Musk or Malibu Musk. I personally don't know anyone that wears anything with musk in it. Isn't musk the smell of under old peoples beds or something?
Zhu Zhu pets remind me of those creepy fake "sleeping cats" made with real cat hair at truck stops and gas stations. They are usually right around the sno-globes and caffeine tablets. That's a dumb toy. People don't even like real hamsters.
The marshmallows in Swiss Miss hot chocolate are super tiny. You expect them to puff up like those capsules that you put in water and the next morning they are big sponges...but they don't. They dissolve first. I drink it anyway and they probably count on that, but I really don't appreciate it.
For me, stars are the clear choice for a tree topper. Angels are too weird because the top of the tree goes straight up their dress....so where IS the tip of the tree?
Exactly. Go ahead, grab a star.
Merry Christmas everyone! Peace and Love!
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